Giving males a positive self-image
2:50:39 2025-02-22 400

Think about the current state of males. If you hear on the radio that a gang of kids are causing a fight, you can be sure that it is male, not female. When we bring up the issue of teenage suicide, four out of every five cases are male. The driver of a car that crashes due to a chase or a speeding frenzy, the problems that arise in the classroom or the playground, thefts, murders, crimes, dictatorships, all of these phenomena are mostly caused by males. But what is the secret?

A boy has five times more problems in school than a girl, ten times more behavioral problems at school, and as a grown man, he will cause four times more accidents than a woman and nine times more prison sentences.

If you have a child, it is not enough to let him grow into a (normal) man, because (normal), in today's world, means being (stressed), and emotionally competitive. It is time to raise a new kind of man.

The first step for us fathers is to have a clear vision of what our son should be when he grows up.

What kind of man do we want?

A group of women are meeting at a weekend seminar on relationships (and in another room, a group of men who are the women’s husbands met). The lecturer asks the women to list the qualities they would like in a man. After a lot of quick jokes like “he should be filthy rich” and other comments, the women begin to think deeply about the answer. Here’s the list I came up with:

  • Fun and loving, but knows when to be serious.
  • Self-reliant, willing to share Balanced and reliable (but not gloomy at work).
  • Has the ability to love sincerely.
  • Is committed to his duties and gets things done.
  • Has the ability to feel sad
  •  Loving but not submissive or dependent.
  • Acknowledges fear, but does not turn all his feelings into a fit of anger.
  • Respects and supports women.
  • Proud of himself, but not arrogant.
  • A nurturer capable of caring for children.
  •  Able to provide security but without violence.
  • Brave and strong.
  • Able to have fun, joke and appreciate beauty.
  • Creative - but not too strict Not a workaholic.
  • Respected by others.

This is what women look for in a man, and I bet this is what men want to have as well.

This means that when we raise our children, we must have some clear goals. This awareness will guide our actions and help us know when to intervene in the most delicate of everyday situations. When a boy mistreats his sister or pushes her when she clearly refuses his request, here the parents must intervene firmly and prevent the son from doing such behavior. We will also do this behavior when his sister mistreats him. However, if the child asks why, we must respond by saying: (Because I want you to grow up, to respect others and to respect yourself. When someone tells you to stop, you must stop), now you can realize how important this is for his future as a whole.

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