4:50:50 
2023-03-28 
696
No matter who you are, there is no doubt that someone will mistreat you at some point in your life. There must be someone who annoys you, betrays you, or does something inappropriate from your point of view.
Although it is perfectly normal for you to experience such feelings, it is not healthy to allow such emotions to take over or affect your life for a long time. The ability to forgive others is an important secret of happiness. And if you refuse to forgive, you will live forever in the role of the victim: and with every minute you feel bitter and angry, you will miss a minute that you could have lived happily!
The good news is that you can practice forgiveness once you understand the full meaning of the word. Forgiveness does not mean simply forgetting what someone did, justifying or excusing their behavior, unreasonably trusting their judgment, giving up your legal rights or making peace with someone when someone's safety or health is in danger. In other words, forgiveness is conditional on preserving your rights and feelings.
Forgiveness is not a one-step process, and the greater the offense against you, the more difficult it will be for you to forgive. But let me ask you this question, is there any grudge that you have been carrying in your heart for a long time? Do something about it!
Start by fully acknowledging what happened and the pain you felt as a result. Decide exactly what forgiveness means within the specific context of your experience and in light of the person who offended you. It may depend on the degree of betrayal and the intentions of the other party.
Make a real effort to understand the other person's position and what led them to do what they did and that ultimately hurt your feelings. Allow yourself to sympathize with him whenever and wherever possible, even for a few moments.
Look at that experience as a lesson learned and try to find a new meaning in it that will compensate you for your pain. Can you learn in any way through this experience, or see life through it in a richer way?
One of the most important steps in the forgiveness process is to discuss all aspects and issues involved with the person or persons involved. Let them know how you feel and avoid blaming. You will find that forgiveness is beneficial for both parties, and can be a preparatory experience for starting a new friendship or relationship.
"Forgiveness does not change the past, but it makes way for the future".
Paul Bowes, 1668-1738 German psychiatrist
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